My JPOP/KPOP OTPs.

In fangirl world, you might come across this certain acronym, “OTP”. Of course, to some people it’s just bromance/girlmance. For me though, it’s more than that. It may not be gay, but you could call it a strong bond between two members. It’s a pretty common feel in the fandom.

Again, this is all coming from me. You could agree on some, but I’m not forcing you to. I don’t wanna start OTP wars around here. Hope you enjoy the pictures though! Sorry if I don’t know much about Kpop yet. As much as possible I’ll keep all the SHINee and EXO pairs in mind. Thank you twitter followers for the suggestions!

Read more

2min – Taemin and Minho (SHINee)

 

 

JongKey – Jonghyun and Key (SHINee)

 

YoonYul – YoonA and Yuri (SNSD)

 

BaekYeol – Baekhyun and Chanyeol (EXO)

 

KrisYeol – Chanyeol and Kris (EXO)

 

HunHan – Sehun and Luhan (EXO)

 

AcchUko – Acchan and Yuko (AKB48)

 

MariHaru – Haruna and Mariko (AKB48)

 

Tegomass – Tegoshi and Massu (NEWS/Tegomass)

 

KoyaShige – Koyama and Shige (NEWS)

 

OhMiya – Ohno and Ninomiya (Arashi)

 

DaiNoo – Daiki and Inoo (Hey! Say! JUMP)

 

HaruTake – Haruma and Takeru (AMUSE Inc.)

 

ShouMiki – Shougo and Kamiki (AMUSE Inc.)

 

OkaJima – Keito and Yuto (Hey! Say! JUMP)

 

YamaChii – Yamada and Chinen (Hey! Say! JUMP / NYC)

 

FujiTama – Fujigaya and Tamamori (Kis-My-Ft2)

 

—

 

Credits: Tumblr

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Johnny’s Golden Voices

This is probably one of the hardest things to do. I couldn’t find the right format for this list so in the end, I decided to just choose a few of my favorite Johnny’s Entertainment bands and name their main vocals/singers. Now, let’s not forget that JE ain’t the best place for good singers, so your opinions may vary against mine. This is all coming from my perspective.

Let’s go over them one by one.

Kikuchi Fuma (Sexy Zone)

Nothing beats fresh faces in the industry, and so the impact of the voice of this young lad was indeed, huge. Coming from a group of kids (besides Kento-nii), Fuma became Sexy Zone’s main vocals due to his ability to reach the high notes even with a low tone when conversing. Fuma stood out more ever since Sexy Zone’s debut. Despite the pain fangirls had to go through when B.I. Shadow didn’t debut, some were kind of glad he finally debuted. This kid just had to. He had the face, and most importantly, he had the voice. We all know that he deserved it. 

Nakajima Kento (Sexy Zone)

In every generation of Johnny’s Jr., there would always be a “people’s choice“. And if there was an ultimate Junior before the time of Sexy Zone’s debut, it would have to be NakaKen. 

Being the leader and “onii-chan” of their group, Kento showed his leadership skills, charismatic charm and idol-like characteristics in a way that he can make the audience focus on him, and him alone, even when performing with a group. Aside from all that talent, NakaKen has also proved his vocal ability during Shokura and Johnny’s Jr. Land by singing live even without music. Although his voice isn’t as impressive as his co-member Fuma, we can all tell that Kento was trained well and enough. I just hope that he achieves the title of being the future Kimura Takuya someday. As some people say, with a voice like that, Kento is the future of Johnny’s entertainment. 

Kitayama Hiromitsu (Kis-My-Ft2)

Johnny’s Ent. should have made this band debut a lot earlier. Then again, Kisumai’s been on a roll ever since their debut last year. I had been anticipating that day right when they started promoting Ikemen Desu Ne. It was the drama where Kitayama guested as himself in A.N.Jell’s concert. He didn’t do much, (he passed by, and that was it.) but he made me laugh pretty much. I was happy he cameo-ed because what’s Kisumai without this guy? His voice is amazing. My personal fave solo of his was the one from Kiss For U. Whenever I hear it, it would give me the goosies. As expected from the big mouth of the group, Kitayama deserves more solos. In fact, they should just give him the whole song. (lol.)

Akanishi Jin

Well.. (lol)

Even if Jin broke the hearts of many fangirls (including yours truly), we all know what kind of voice he possesses. A mixture of sexy with a hint of huskiness lives inside Jin’s vocal chords. That bad boy look comes with a bad boy sound. His voice along with KATTUN’s old songs, and even in his songs today, still contains that passionate, sensual vibe we once felt since he was a junior. 

More power to him and Meisa. *fights back the tears* 

Shibutani Subaru (Kanjani8)

When I first saw the promotions of “Dream Boys”, Subaru’s voice immediately appealed to me. Kanjani eight contains multiple musically-inclined talents and so I wasn’t surprised to find Subaru as one of their members. I wasn’t surprised to find out that he was a top Kansai Johnny’s Jr. back then along with his co-member Nishikido Ryo. 

I personally enjoy listening to Subaru’s voice. My favorite Kanjani songs would have to be Tsubasa ni Koi and Ai Deshita. I listen to it mainly because of Subaru’s voice. It’s rock-y and fun to imitate (even if I fail miserably). 

Ninomiya Kazunari (Arashi)

Well, it’s part of my policy as a fangirl to never call a certain member a “bias”, and so for Arashi, I neglected this rule of mine. Nino is the apple of my eye in this band. Even if he stands at around 164cm, he is still my favorite member. Besides his ability to look Forever 17, one of the other things I loved about him was that he could play the piano, and his voice is just wonderful (mainly while playing the piano). Nino’s singing emphasizes Arashi’s musical essence. He encouraged me to actually believe that they could sing live. (lol) 

Nino’s piano solos + Live singing + Rain = Explosion of ovaries.

Ohno Satoshi (Arashi)

During Johnny’s survey/ranking, Ohno’s always been that number one guy when it comes to being the lead vocalist. I mean, he’s definitely one of my faves in Arashi. Let’s face it. If we had a chance to hear Arashi live, besides Nino, Ohno is probably the only one who could dance like boss and sing like a god. His voice is Arashi heaven. Music Station’s best with Ohno’s live solos. I don’t see why this little giant doesn’t deserve the title, “Leader”. Pushing aside his derpyness, when on stage, Ohno is the only one my ears literally focus on. There is absolutely no wonder why a lot of his kouhais admire him. His acting is awesome, his dancing is remarkable, and of course his singing is amazing. Johnny did the right thing when he decided to put money on Ohno. (lol)

Masuda Takahisa (NEWS/Tegomass)

NEWS is a band for unending talent. My love for the band got me into Johnny’s. When it comes to their songs, of course, we can’t help but wonder who owns that low, soothing, relaxing, sexy, full voice. It’s obviously none other than Massu. Even if he may not look like he possesses a soothing voice, well…he does. Behind all that hilarious antics and humorous personality, he definitely has a relaxing sound. I, along with thousands of his other fans agree that he can be both a dancing and singing machine. Massu’s talent is unending, very fit to be a member of NEWS. “Forever” would have to be my favorite song. And I can’t help but try (but fail miserably, again) and copy Massu’s low notes in “Kiss Kaerimichi no Love Song”.

Tegoshi Yuya (NEWS/Tegomass)

And so my list ends with the vagina of NEWS. Can I just say that Tego was my very first Johnny’s love? He has a face that can make me question my self-esteem. He has the appeal that can persuade girls into changing their genders. I used to think about him every second of my day. When I first encountered his voice in “Kiss Kaerimichi no Love Song”, I just knew that it had to be love. His solos in concerts, his version of “Ai Nante”, his high notes in every single NEWS/Tegomass song, is ultimate secks. If I had a chance to marry Tego without a voice, I would say no in an instant. (lol, as if) 

—

Credits: Tokyohive, DramaWiki, Johnny’s Web.

Pictures: Tumblr, Fanpop, Crunchyroll.

Choi Minho: Eye-candy.

Tenteneneeeeen!

To those who don’t know Minho yet, please go hang yourself now.

.. Just kidding.

Okay, I’m not like those other Shawols who have been loving SHINee ever since their debut. Really, I’m not. Though ever since I did get into loving them, it’s always been Lee Taemin. He’s the apple of my eye in Kpop, seriously…but this isn’t a Taemin-appreciation post (yet) so, I guess before I get carried away I should start talking about my other SHINee crush: Minho.

Choi Min Ho (Hangul: 최민호; Hanja: 崔珉豪; born December 9, 1991) is a South Korean idol singer, rapper, dancer, actor,model, lyricist, promotional model and presenter. He is a member of South Korean boy group Shinee under the label of SM Entertainment, as the main rapper, visual, and sub vocalist.

Credits from source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Choi_Minho

Minho joined SM on the year 2006. From what I know, he modeled about two months before SHINee’s debut. The first time I got a glimpse of his face was when I saw the PV of SNSD’s Japanese version of “Gee”. He also appeared in the Korean version, apparently.

As a singer, Minho has a pretty neutral voice. It’s kind of difficult to notice because of Onew’s big mouth  and Jonghyun’s even bigger mouth(sorry, Jjong. I love you.). Even so, when I saw a video of him singing live in a radio show, I could tell that he could sing. He may not be a good singer, but IMO, he’s capable. Being a fan of JPOP idol groups as well, I would know the definition of “bad singer”. *immediately starts fanwars once more*


As a rapper, Minho’s pretty neutral as well. He’s not the best rapper there is considering that he and Key share pretty much the same role in SHINee. Although Minho is the main rapper, I’m sure I’ve heard better ones. 


In dancing, I would always find Minho a little awkward. Some fans think that he can dance as well as the other members, but in I can’t help but find it a bit odd. It could be because of his tall figure that I find it different, but I rarely notice. My eyes never glue themselves to Minho whenever I watch SHINee dance. Of course he isn’t the main dancer, so it’s obviously not his forte. 


Not too long ago I watched his drama entitled, “Salamander Guru and The Shadows”. He played the main character Min Hyuk where he acts as a genius hacker with social phobia. To be honest it was a pretty weird thing for Minho playing a guy who has social phobia considering his flaming charisma (lol) and attractiveness. I actually lost attention to whatever else was happening in the drama because of his hotness. Sometimes I would even skip the boring parts just to get to his parts. Yes, that’s how biased I am when it comes to dramas. All in all though it was good. I don’t wanna spoil people so if you wanna watch it for Minho, then I would recommend that you do. Ahem Taemin was in two episodes, ahem. 


Do I seriously have to write about Minho being a model? 


Next, according to my sources and stalking skills, Minho is known to have written several raps in SHINee’s songs. In their early albums, he co-wrote along with SM lyricists. Minho even wrote raps to their Japanese songs.

Please, do not get me into ranting on SHINee and their phail Japanese. 


I get a bit sad sometimes when I see the other four members guesting in television shows without Minho. Although they never disregard him, I always wonder why he doesn’t participate with them as much.

Blah, I overwrote again. 


You’re probably wondering why I posted this. Well, besides showing my love for this crush of mine, I wrote because of their Korean adaptation of the Japanese manga, “Hana Kimi.” It is said to be airing on August 9. Actually, I’ve watched all the remakes of this drama, and I absolutely despised every single one of them. The first ever Hana Kimi was so good, I can’t help but say how crappy the following ones were. If it weren’t for Minho, Sulli and EXO, I wouldn’t watch this drama for my life.

Anyway, might as well get back to staring at Minho’s abs.

See ya. 

You’re so cute, JEEZES EFFING CHROIST. 

Hello world!

Welcome to WordPress.com! This is your very first post. Click the Edit link to modify or delete it, or start a new post. If you like, use this post to tell readers why you started this blog and what you plan to do with it.

Happy blogging!

TOP 5 AMUSE TALENTS (Male)

Besides the idols from AKB48, Johnny’s Entertainment, Hello! Project, Stardust etc., there is this certain agency wherein not only the talented can get in, but also the intelligent.

Yes, I’m talking about AMUSE inc. (株式会社　アミューズ Kabushikigaisha Amyūzu). 

Although it’s not as widely known as an idol-industry, AMUSE showcases a large number of all-in-one talents. This post of mine will bring out a list of my personal favorite male Amuse idols. You can say that most of them are already popular, or you’d probably think that I’ve only come to know of them because of the number of appearances they’ve been in. Well even if my knowledge for Amuse inc isn’t as broad as JE, I can definitely say that I most probably know enough to write about them now. 

No need for serious/violent reactions though. This list comes from all my personal opinions, and mine alone.


Note: I was going to put Sakamoto Shougo as my number 1, but since he’s technically not in Amuse anymore, I decided not to. /cries/

—

TOP 5 MALE AMUSE TALENTS

5) Sakurada Dori

Sakurada Dori or I dare call him “Shakurada Dori“(only AMUSE fans would get me), is best known for being the third generation Ryoma Echizen in the Prince of Tennis Musical or Tenimyu. At first I didn’t really notice this boy until I stalked his blog (which apparently is more active than his magazine shoots). It was where I found out that he was the third entertainer who played my long-time anime crush, Ryoma. 

Ever since I started seeing Dori more on stage, I came to like him fast. His “tsundere” charm can immediately catch the heart of fangirls. Even if his dramas and movies like “Ousama Game” are a little crappy and underrated (in my opinion, that is.), I still like how Dori shows himself under the bright lights. 

Being a blog-addict, Dori’s very open with his personal life. He keeps fans updated regularly through random pictures of him during his every day life as an Amuse talent. That site of his is one of the main evidences of his enormous sense of humor. On stage and on cam, coming from me, Dori can be idol-like and glittery, but after seeing him in The Game: Boy’s Film Show, I saw how much more derp this boy can actually offer. 

Everything about Dori is a plus, besides the fact that his constant projects with H!P are pulling him down a bit. I hope to see him interact more with better actresses, mainly the ones in his own agency. He deserves it. 

4) Kaku Kento

Now of course, what’s a TOP 5 AMUSE list without our beloved derp?

Kaku Kento or Kakkun appealed to me since I saw him in Asuko March. The ending made me weep in agony and so to calm myself down, I just had to know him more. 

There’s not much info about Kento on the web, but his blog definitely shows that he is fond of sour, wacky and not-at-all-camera-ready shots. With that kind of exposure, we can all tell that he’s an outgoing, crazy lunatic who has 234567890 other personalities. 

Just like other multi-talented Amuse boys, Kakkun has an obvious deep, passionate relationship with acting. From a sensitive tsundere, to a rock-band bad boy, to a delinquent outsider, or may it be to a hopeless romantic, Kakkun can be it all. And it’s not only through his overwhelming charm as an actor he showcases these talents of his, but also through a voice that captivates all that listen to it. After repeating The Game and Super Handsome Live! multiple times, I’ve noticed how Kakkun can really project that amazing vocally fortunate sound he owns. Kakkun, in spite of the nutsy-coo-coo personality, has the full potential to be more than an actor, but an idol. 

I’m glad he became a part of the Romeo and Juliet musical. Hoping for more of Kakkun-related stages in near future!    

 3) Sato Takeru

One of the main individuals that carry Amuse’s good name would definitely have to be Sato Takeru. 

I first saw him in Mei-chan no Shitsuji wherein he plays Eikura Nana’s best friend Kento. In the beginning, I thought that he wasn’t really that special because his role could be labeled as another “other guy”, and you should know how much I hate it when good actors play that supporting best friend who doesn’t get the girl. Even so, Takeru made things bearable for me. I like how he played his roles in Kamen Rider Den-O, Bloody Monday and BECK. His mulitiple personalities gave me good reasons to watch the upcoming Rurouni Kenshin. 

Amuse puts a lot of work on Takeru. His projects have been raining every since his debut role in Kamen Rider. His exposure is exceptionally special in the agency due to his ability to engross his audience. Takeru can sing, dance and act all so well. His success is what he is now.

Although his appearance isn’t as attractive as his fellow colleagues, Takeru (according to The Game, lol.) can and will always get the girl. Even if he’s a little vertically challenged, I know how hard he has worked to get to where he is now; and that is, the top of Amuse.   

2) Miura Haruma

Ah, the very inhuman Harucchi. Who would dare not notice that smile? 

I met Miura Haruma from 14 sai no Haha wherein he co-starred with my ultimate idol Shida Mirai. I think it’s Haruma’s dramas I’ve watched the most out of all the Amuse boys (besides Mr. Number One on my list).

Koizora, Kimi ni Todoke and Gokusen: The Movie would have to be my favorite movies. I fell in love with all his characters the minute he started playing them. His smile, his charisma, his unending list of handsome attributes would all contribute to my love bank. 

Harucchi was destined for greatness from the very start of his career. Watching him when he was only sixteen years of age made me wanna give up at first, but as he grew in the industry, he also started to grow on me. 

In Koizora, as Hiro, Haruma cruelly made me cry like a hungry baby. In Kimi ni Todoke, he made me spazz like the deluded fangirl that I am. In Gokusen both in the drama and the movie, he made me laugh with total busted guts. Of course I’d fall for him. Who wouldn’t, right? /points to his picture above/

1) Kamiki Ryuunosuke

Well of course any J-drama fanatic would know this young man. He is Amuse’s golden boy, and future number 1 money-maker. With a large number of success at such a young age, Ryuunosuke has proved to Japanese entertainment what he can do. 

Freshly graduated from Horikoshi Gakuen alongside other child entertainers like Shida Mirai, HSJ, Kawashima Umika etc., Kamiki or Miki is said to be one of Japan’s highly anticipated young actors of his time. The industry’s expectations for him are as high as when he first started; which was at the age of just two years old. His talent surpasses a mile from those involved in his generation of faces in the entertainment business. 

Playing more than 40 characters, Miki sure worked his butt off to become the ultimate baby of Amuse. Right after watching him on Tantei Gakuen Q, I just knew that he’d be one of the reasons why I’m very much into Japanese drama. Becoming a part of my childhood, he’s offered all of what he has to become my favorite actor in Japan. I love him to bits, and I just know that I will continue to support him in whatever he does, and will do. Miki’s acting skills stand out the most for me because of his contact with his viewers that apparently pull me into a trance wherein he makes me love him more. 

With that much talent, and captivating aura, Miki is sure to become one of the richest, most popular TV icons. I wouldn’t be surprised if he went international. 

I love you, Miki. 


—


And even if Sakamoto Shougo ain’t a part of Amuse anymore, I still have the liberty to post a picture of him, right? 

I fucking miss and love you Shougo! 😦

—

Credits:

Pictures and gifs: TUMBLR

Extra information: DramaWiki

Yamada Ryosuke: Johnny’s Golden Boy

A certain member of JUMP’s gonna star in a drama! Again.. (what’s new?)

As one of my fellow fangirls on twitter once said, “It is hard for one to hate a Yamada Ryosuke”, made me think of the reasons why he wasn’t one to suit my taste in idols.

Who could blame the thousands of girls that worship him? He has worked his butt off to get to where he is now. I know very well what he had to go through as a Junior, and am undeniably finding it hard to admit that he absolutely deserves his position now.

You’re probably thinking. “why am I having a hard time admitting then?”

Well first off is that he has way too much exposure. I don’t know if it’s the manager’s fault or is it just because he hogs for all of that attention. All I could see is that in those certain bands he’s currently being active in (Hey! Say! JUMP and NYC), he is taking up way too many positions.

Maybe it’s just me being a lover of “equal exposure”, but it could be because I may be right. I mean, I don’t know if anybody else notices, but JUMP is starting to revolve around him, and NYC is beginning to look like “Yamada and two other guys.” You’d be blind if you yourself haven’t noticed it yet. Yamada is JUMP’s center, main vocalist, main dancer and visual. If they’re not going to make way for any Inoo and Keito exposure any time soon, then the company should might as well make him go solo.

Yes, solo. The word is indeed dreading, isn’t it? It has happened to YamaPi (former NEWS member) and Jin (former KATTUN member) before, so I wouldn’t be surprised if Kitagawa-jii would announce one day that Ryosuke would be better off without the other members of HSJ. Bash me now but in my opinion, if the scandal had happened to him and not Ryutaro, JUMP would have been fucked.

In my eyes, Yamada is gorgeous, talented and hard-working, but the problem is that I see the exact same determination and perseverance in the other members of the group. Every single one of them deserves more than a 5-second cut in a video, just to be fair to those who have been in the industry for as long as he has, or maybe even longer.

I don’t hate Yamada. In fact, he was my very first HSJ eye-candy. I’ve had a huge crush on him back then as he played Amakusa Ryuu in Tantei Gakuen Q. I had only begun to lose interest when he started to think of his job as, “just a job,” and stopped looking like he loved what he was doing. The glint in his eyes faded away ever since I saw him at the Winter concert in Yokohama Arena. Besides his arrogance while on stage, and while on cam, deep down I know there’s still that humble, sweet little Ryosuke from that audition.

JUMP’s managers should know that HSJ would have to have a place for all 9 of them equally. It’s time to make Ryosuke take the break that he deserves.

It’s hard to hate Ojii’s favorite. Plus, you shouldn’t have a reason to. You can tease him all you want, just as long as you’re ready for all the hates that’ll come from his fans.

I would know. Yamada and I have a love-hate relationship.

Fangirls: Your worst enemies

Being a hardcore fangirl of both Jpop and kpop (just EXO and SHINee), of course I have made quite a few encounters in my life. These encounters include fellow supporters, bloggers, and online friends that share the same interests.

However, just like in this socially impaired world, there are instances wherein individuals cannot be accepted in certain norms.

Take my experience as an example. I’ve been a fan of jpop for a very long time. It runs in my veins now, and there are others who share that same blood as me.

But having the same blood didn’t always mean we’d all get along.

As most of my friends know, I’m an incredibly insecure and jealous person. I may not say it sometimes, but really I am. I have met other girls who were as obsessed as me with JUMP and AMUSE, so I guess you could call me “experienced.”

Each and every one of them had a story tell, personality, and perspective. Definitely it was something I became interested in. I actually enjoyed hearing some opinions, comments and rants of others about a common fandom.

And so I started to follow them on twitter, livejournal, and added them on Facebook. Sure they were friendly at first, but aren’t we all?

Slowly it occurred to me that online friends could end up to be your worst enemies. It was sad to know that the people whom you thought were your friends, turned out to be the people who were slowly ruining your image.

And so some of us had a little disagreement, but so what? As I said, we have the freedom to express. I’m sorry if I don’t like Yamada as much as you do, and I’m sorry if I killed you when I said that Yuto, Ryosuke and Chinen weren’t gay, and I’m sorry if you were Kakkun’s wife (but Dear Lord who wouldn’t want to bake cookies on him?), and so kill me. If that’s their way of showing their love towards their idols, /inserts impending sarcasm here/ then I envy them. /sarcasm off/

I don’t really care if my opinion clashes with another. Knowing that everyone has their own way of thinking is wonderful. It’s just that the lack of acceptance in this certain situation is slowly killing the relationships of what’s supposed to be called a “friendship.”

I like how some would think differently. To me, they deserve to be respected. And you can call me a hypocrite now because I exceptionally hate Hello! Project. I just can’t control my hatred on twitter.

But that’s another story to tell. 😉

Confessions of an ex-JUMPer.

Here I am once again with another emo post. It just so happens that many fellow fangirls of mine have been asking me about the reasons why I broke up with Hey! Say! JUMP. I haven’t really clarified it in my previous posts about my departure from the fandom, so I’ll state it down briefly right here.

There is no main reason why I left. I actually have a number of reasons. But for the sake of my wondering friends, I’m going to let it all out one by one:

1) I was becoming greedy. My parents are giving me good money just to feel HSJ’s presence in my life. Mom knows well how much they made me happy, and so for the sake of avoiding my child-like tantrums, she gave me what we both thought I needed. Being so undeniably spoiled, I practically begged with threats just to fly, and spend every single penny I had just to be where they were. Yes, I am not even exaggerating. I go there just to watch them. And you know how much money I’m wasting? Of course you do. And that’s how crazy I was.

2) Rather than inspiration, JUMP was becoming an utter distraction. Since it became my obsession, I’ve never had the chance to concentrate. My priorities were put aside, and my lust for them took over me as a whole. Why, how and when I started to transform, I have no idea. All I know is that I stopped studying, and paused everything I used to love doing. I was isolated in this own world wherein all I could think and breathe was them. Even if they were the cause of my smiles before, I just can’t go back. I couldn’t.

3) The news about HK tour. I didn’t know what to feel. Should I be appalled? Should I be amused? Should I be ashamed of those fellow JUMPers who had absolutely no humility at all? I don’t know. All that I know was that I wasn’t liking it one bit. I didn’t know which side to defend. HK fans were different, yes. But that’s just about it. They’re not Japanese, and it was the very first time JUMP ever visited, so what did they expect? A more peaceful welcome? Aren’t they supposed to be happy? HK fans only wanted to express the outcome of their love through hard work. I expected JUMP to handle it professionally, but instead, they complained. They angered on the cultural shock they had experienced. What does an intelligent and very wide awake fangirl have to think? I loved them to bits, even at that time! Little did I know, one day I just had to heal from this blindness. That was when I started my rehabilitation.

4) After expressing all my thoughts on twitter, Facebook and livejournal, I gained a lot of hate mails. I don’t understand how and why the fandom became this much intoxicated on HSJ’s love. What happened to an honest and open-minded fangirl like me was this: I was hated not because I kept ranting of how annoying this whole thing turned out to be, but because I started to become honest. For the first time in my life I noticed all of the flaws.

Right then I just knew that I had to learn. I had to grow up. My life had to go on because of the nothingness this love was giving me. I WAS SO MUCH IN LOVE WITH HSJ, IT WAS STARTING TO HURT. And as much as it pierces me right now, I cannot deny that I do miss them, and that I still feel that small pain whenever I see them, whenever I hear them, and whenever I see how successful they have become ever since I left. HSJ made me happy, even if in the end we’d end up “Just Friends.”

I’ve lost the will to call myself a JUMPer, I’ve deleted every picture I have, I’ve sold some of the merchandise I used to worship so much and just plain stopped, cleansed and rehabilitated.

In the end, I just couldn’t be bitter. Even I know well why I simply can’t be. They still make me smile occasionally, but this doesn’t mean I will ever feel the same anytime soon.

I’m an EXOTIC now. I’m a Shawol too. Of course still forever a-MUSE, and an AKB fan at heart, but this is just me, starting out fresh again, trying to avoid my previous mistakes as a fangirl. I just know that I can’t afford another heartbreak from this. Just like that first, second, and third break up of mine, someday I know I’ll completely move on from being a JUMPer.

And so ends my post here. Long and exaggerated to some, am I right? I hope it turns out meaningful to others. You can’t always take my word for it. Just keep in mind that a boy band is just a boy band, and even if you pour out all your affection, they will remain in this certain position in your life.

No matter how much feelings you show, and no matter how much you spend, someday you will learn that life needs to keep going. Remember that there is more to life than them.

My Suho-appreciation post.

Uncontrollably pouring my feelings onto this blog once again.

Now, you’re probably wondering about why I entitled this post, “Suho-appreciation post.” Well, I don’t exactly know where to start, but I’ll probably begin with this:

I was browsing around twitter, tumblr and so and so, when I stumbled upon this certain forum that had this certain thread dedicated to our lovely guardian Suho.

Apparently, a lot of fans are saying that leader probably has the least number of fans in the whole EXO community.

Yes, someone had actually have the nerve to say that.

Excuse me for being a sensitive fangirl, but can I please ask why? Is it because he’s the most underrated amongst all of the members? Is it because he’s THAT quiet? Or is it because others are all too biased?

Speaking for those who do not necessarily have an “ichiban”, here. I’ve totally closed my walls to this whole bias thing. I cannot possibly have just one anyway. Suho might not be my “favorite”, but I don’t think he has a “small” number of fans. I’m so sorry, but why are they counting anyways? Equally, they are all cute and lovable. The same with any other group a particular fangirl could be in love with. As I know, everyone has an idol that suits their taste, but believe me, rational fangirls wouldn’t dare to fall in love with just one.

Admit it! We have cheated on every single guy we’ve entitled our, “bias”. How do you guys do that anyway? How do you know when that idol is your “bias”? It’s so difficult. (Or is it just me? Lol.)

AND! How can you people NOT love this amazing guy? Sure he lacks SOME characteristics of a leader, but that’s not a reason to love him less. (HAHA. I’m trying my best to sound as complimenting as possible, Suho.) People should stop comparing him to Kris. Suho is a leader too. And he didn’t become one for no reason.

Best skin, amazing voice, captivating smile, I literally cannot, and I MEAN KENAT see how fans even find time know how many fans each member has. Suho is still special, even if he just laughs at his fellow members all the time. I find him adorably unique that way.

Testing my iPhone app.

Downloaded the blogger app for iPhone! Don’t mind me, I’m just testing. Haha.

And to ease up your moods, here is a picture of our lovable derp: